I hate building anything from scratch, especially if I have put my heart and soul into something and then, that just goes away. I know it will, very soon. Not so soon, but soon enough to actually realize.

Mamu used to tell me not to make too many friends, he'd say make friends but only keep them at a distance, so that they don't get to set any expectation on you. Back then, I was like what a fuckin' loser man, but now. when all my realationships fail or just fizzle out, I begin to think.

I don't like it. It is untrue that everyone is alone in this world. Everyone has somebody, where is my someone? Where? I don't like being alone at all, and boy, I AM alone. :( :(

I don't know what to say anymore, because at this point of time, I am not feeling very good. I actually want to be pampered a bit, and if possible loved. :( :^(